GREEN (TURKEY) DAY

Since early 2008, I have been filling my psychological and social voids in superficial ways to no avail. My life lacks the companionship and intimacy needed for reaching the apex of Maslow’s Triangle. I am trying to fill these voids by drowning myself in a sea of pointless pussy. Word to Californication.

We all have our ups and downs, smiles and frowns. We later find out that every thing is make believe. I have had my downs and now it’s time to get up. When you’re at the bottom, the only way to go is up.

With the help of my close friends, a new job offer, and the enticing potential of the hoasis of women with whoreganizing opportunities that await my arrival to the ATL, I will soon say, HE HAS RISEN out of this rut…but only ‘cause Cornell Westside likes to rhyme in third person.

Living in 5 cities within a 3 year span has taught me a lot. I have figured out what comes natural to me and more importantly, I have learned what comes natural to other people and how to pry that out of them.

In particular, I have been influenced by 3 people in my life whom are more than my friends; they are my brothers, my therapists, and my mentors.

Shaq: you have taught me, by actions more than words, that Nike had it right all along. Just Do It. I wish you infinite success in the world of start-up companies, stomach viruses, rolled r’s and water you can’t drink.

Kobe: Pluto, relevance, and doing what’s comes natural to you. Need I say more? Remembering those tenants of life will not only get anyone as far as they want to go in life, but farther than one can ever imagine. And I can’t forget that I was introduced to the occult art of “pulling the rug out from under her” by you. “Sometimes you just gotta show nuccas…cause sometimes you gotta do stuff for the story and not the principle.”

Coach Phil: From you, I’ve learned to “intellectualize my problems”, “put myself in the situations where I’ll be most effective”, “ride the first horse” [pause], and last but not least to “go f*ck Oprah” when the situation calls for it. Kevin Federline is the American Dream!

I just wanted to thanks and shyt. I just got a one-way ticket out of a bad situation by being offered a promotion in a recession, a nucca is supposed to get emotional.

Ok, now that I got that out the way, let’s get back to our regularly scheduled ignorance.

A T L A N T A G A THAT'S WHERE I STAY!!

P.S. I learned today that before you delete that crazy chick’s number from your phone, you should write it down somewhere in case she sends you an invitation back to HELL (read: random text message) months later.